Morality & Ethics (Akhlaq)

Speaking Only Good or Remaining Silent

Speak Only Good or Remain Silent

Introduction

Words have power. They can heal or harm, inspire or discourage, unite or divide. In Islam, the way we speak is not just a reflection of our manners—it is a reflection of our very faith and character. Every word we say can bring us closer to Allah (God) or distance us from Him.

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) taught a profound lesson that echoes clearly across time:

“Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should speak what is good or remain silent.”

This simple yet powerful advice emphasizes that faith isn’t only what we feel inside—it's also demonstrated through our speech and actions. Imagine how different our lives could be if we paused just long enough to ask ourselves, “Are these words helpful or harmful?” before we spoke.

In Islam, every word matters. Our words have the potential to uplift someone’s spirit, spread wisdom, or build bridges of kindness. On the other hand, a careless word can cause deep pain, destroy trust, and even spark conflict.

That’s why Muslims are strongly encouraged to think before they speak, ensuring their words are truthful, kind, and beneficial. If we cannot find something good or helpful to say, choosing silence is not simply polite—it is an active demonstration of faith.

In this article, we’ll journey through the wisdom found in the Quran and authentic Hadith (teachings of the Prophet), explore insightful lessons from respected scholars, uncover why this teaching makes perfect sense logically and spiritually, and discover practical ways to incorporate this beautiful principle into our daily lives.

Quranic Evidence: Guidance on Good Speech and Silence

The Quran (the holy book of Islam) is filled with wisdom about how we should speak. Below are some of the key verses where Allah advises believers either to speak goodness or to refrain from bad speech. Each verse is a lesson guiding us toward positive, respectful communication and cautioning us against harmful words:

These Quranic teachings cover all aspects of speech: speak kindly, honestly, and gently; don’t be rude or unjust; avoid gossip and insults; and remember that Allah is listening and recording. The Quran guides Muslims to use their tongues for good – such as truth, kindness, reconciliation, and remembrance of God – and to avoid causing any harm with their words. If we follow these verses, our communication will build love and trust, and we’ll avoid many common problems that start with a careless tongue.

Sahih Hadith Compilation: Prophetic Sayings on Speech

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) further explained and lived by these Quranic principles. There are many hadiths (recorded sayings and actions of the Prophet) that emphasize speaking good or staying silent. Below is a collection of authentic (sahih) hadiths on this topic, each teaching us a valuable lesson:

These hadiths (and many others like them) consistently reinforce the same message: guard your tongue, because it’s a critical part of being a good Muslim. The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) was known as al-Sadiq al-Amin (the truthful and trustworthy). He always spoke truthfully, gently, and wisely. He joked without lying, he praised what deserved praise, and he stayed silent rather than engage in idle talk. By following his example and heeding his words above, Muslims believe they can earn Allah’s pleasure, build strong communities, and protect themselves from regret in this life and the next.

Historical and Scholarly Commentary

Throughout Islamic history, scholars and wise figures have given special attention to the topic of controlling one’s speech. Both classical scholars from the early centuries of Islam and modern scholars today emphasize this principle, often echoing the Prophet’s words “speak good or remain silent.” Let’s look at some insights and examples from various scholars and the righteous people of the past, including perspectives from the major schools of thought (Hanafi, Maliki, Shafi’i, Hanbali):

Insights of the Early Generations (Salaf): The Prophet’s companions and their followers practiced what he taught about speech. For example, it’s reported that Abu Bakr As-Siddiq (the first caliph and close friend of the Prophet) was so cautious of his tongue that on one occasion Umar ibn al-Khattab found him pulling on his own tongue as a reprimand to himself! “Stop, may Allah forgive you!” Umar said, but Abu Bakr responded, “This (tongue) has brought me to dangerous places.” He was expressing how past words had nearly gotten him into trouble, and he wanted to discipline himself. This level of self-accountability shows how seriously the early Muslims took the matter of speech. Another companion, Abdullah ibn Mas’ud, famously said, “There is nothing more deserving of long imprisonment than the tongue.” He meant that if anything should be kept on a tight leash or even “locked up,” it’s our own tongue, due to how much damage it can do if unleashed. Ibn Mas’ud would also advise, “O tongue! Say good and gain (reward), or remain silent and be safe.” Such sayings became proverbs among Muslims.

Imams of the Four Schools: The great imams who founded the major schools of law (Madhhabs) also reiterated the importance of guarding the tongue.

All Scholars Agree: One remarkable thing is that all scholars, regardless of school, have unanimously regarded certain types of speech as major sins. For example, lying, perjury (false testimony), backbiting (gossiping about someone’s actual faults behind their back), slander (spreading lies about someone), cursing others unjustly, and using obscene language — every school of Islamic law says these are prohibited (haram). There was no debate or difference in opinion on these because the Quran and hadith evidence is so clear on them. This unanimous stance over 1400 years shows how central clean and truthful speech is in Islam. In books of Islamic creed, scholars even list “guarding one’s tongue” as one of the signs of a true believer.

Imam Al-Ghazali’s Perspective: Moving forward a few centuries, Imam Al-Ghazali (11th-12th century), a famous theologian and scholar, wrote extensively about ethics in his masterpiece Ihya’ Ulum al-Din (The Revival of the Religious Sciences). He identified many “diseases of the tongue” that one must watch out for. These included obvious ones like lying and backbiting, but also more subtle ones like talking about things that are not one’s business, arguing for the sake of ego, or excessive joking to the point it hurts feelings or truth. Al-Ghazali said that the tongue is a great blessing from Allah — with it we can remember Allah, recite Quran, teach others, and express love — but if misused, the tongue can be “sharper than a sword.” He gave the example that a sword can only wound physically, but a sharp tongue can wound someone’s heart, which sometimes takes much longer to heal. He advised Muslims to engage the tongue in Dhikr (remembrance of God) and useful knowledge, so that there’s literally no time or space for it to engage in evil. Essentially, he recommended filling your mouth with good, so the bad has no room to slip out!

Ibn Hajar’s Commentary: Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani (15th century), a great hadith scholar who wrote a commentary on Sahih Bukhari, commented on the hadith “speak good or remain silent.” He noted that this single Prophetic saying “gathers all of good manners (adab) in speech.” It’s like an all-inclusive rule for verbal etiquette. If followed, it covers truthful speech, kind speech, avoidance of lies and abuse, etc., because all those are part of “speak good.” And it covers avoiding all bad manners of the tongue because they fall under “remain silent (instead).” Ibn Hajar and others also pointed out that the Prophet’s same hadith included being good to neighbors and guests — which shows how speech ties into action. Speaking good to your neighbors and guests is part of treating them well, while staying silent instead of arguing with them is also part of good hospitality. So this one hadith truly brings together many aspects of good character. Later scholars from all schools often quote Ibn Hajar’s note to highlight the comprehensive nature of the “speak good or be silent” teaching.

Contemporary Scholars: Modern scholars and teachers continue to stress the importance of mindful speech, especially in our age of instant communication. For instance, scholars from Al-Azhar University (a major center of learning in Egypt) frequently address issues of social media and gossip in light of Quranic principles. They often say things like, “The phone (or keyboard) has now taken the role of the tongue, so guard your texts and posts as you would guard your tongue.” The principle remains the same. Famous preachers like Mufti Menk or Omar Suleiman have given talks reminding people that Islam doesn’t allow trolling, cyber-bullying, or spreading rumors online just because you’re behind a screen. They cite the same verses and hadiths we discussed, applying them to texting, tweeting, and so on. One contemporary scholar humorously said, “Before you speak or type, think: would I say this in front of the Prophet ﷺ? If not, delete it or zip it.” It’s a modern spin on an old idea: be God-conscious (have taqwa) about every word.

Wisdom from Caliphs and Saints: We also have wise words passed down from caliphs and sages. Ali ibn Abi Talib (the 4th Caliph, revered by s and Shia alike for his wisdom) reportedly said, “Your speech will show who you are, so guard it as you guard your gold.” He also advised that silence can be an answer: “Silence is often the best reply to a fool.” This teaches patience and avoiding getting dragged into useless arguments. Sufi scholars (Islamic spiritual teachers) likewise listed “watching your tongue” as a step toward purity of the heart. They observed that the tongue often says what’s in the heart, so by forcing the tongue to behave, you actually train your heart to be cleaner too (because you stop feeding it negativity).

In summary, classical scholars from all traditions and modern scholars all agree on the vital importance of speaking only good or staying silent. They might use different words or cultural examples, but the core message is unified. Whether it’s a jurist in Baghdad in the 800s or a Mufti on YouTube in 2025, you’ll hear echoes of the Prophet’s teaching. The universality of this advice, and the fact that it’s been emphasized by so many generations, shows how practical and wise it is. It’s a value that transcends time and place. After all, human nature hasn’t changed: we still have the urge to gossip or snap in anger, and we still see the harm it causes. Thus, our scholars keep reminding us: Harness your tongue, and you will attain goodness. As one Islamic proverb says, “The tongue is tiny but what it yields is enormous.” We’ve learned this from the best of our tradition, so it’s on us now to implement it.

Logical and Theological Arguments for Islam’s Teachings on Speech

You might wonder, “Why is Islam’s teaching on speech the best approach? What makes ‘speak good or remain silent’ superior to other ideas about how we use words?” Let’s explore this from both a logical perspective (common sense and social benefits) and a theological perspective (deeper spiritual reasoning). We’ll also compare it to alternative attitudes about speech.

1. Preventing Harm and Promoting Good (Logical Benefit):
Think about almost any conflict – a school fight, a family argument, international disputes – and you’ll usually find that words played a huge role in starting or escalating it. Rumors, insults, lies, and careless remarks often light the fire of conflict. Islam’s teaching effectively says: “Take away that spark.” By avoiding harmful speech, we prevent so many problems before they even begin. It’s common sense that if I never speak badly about others, I’ll avoid unnecessary enemies and drama. And if I make a habit of kind words, I’ll likely gain friends and create an atmosphere of positivity around me. Other perspectives might say “Free speech means I can say what I want; it’s others’ problem if they’re hurt.” But look at the outcomes: a society where everyone says whatever, even if cruel, ends up with bullying, broken relationships, and mistrust. Islam doesn’t deny freedom of speech – it encourages speaking up – but it adds a moral filter: freedom comes with responsibility. This way, we enjoy open communication plus mutual respect. It’s a win-win. In fact, many secular proverbs agree with Islam here. For example, “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all” – this is practically the same wisdom! Islam’s teaching on speech takes that folk wisdom and elevates it to a religious duty, ensuring people actually value and practice it, not just mention it.

2. Accountability Leads to Better Behavior (Theological insight):
The belief that Allah is listening and angels are recording our words (as mentioned in Quran 50:18) might sound heavy, but it has a positive effect: it builds an inner conscience and self-restraint. Consider someone who doesn’t believe in any higher accountability – they might avoid saying bad things only when certain people are around or when there’s a risk of punishment (like a student might behave in front of a teacher but bully others when alone). However, a Muslim is taught that Allah is always present and aware. This means even when no human is watching, our words matter. The result? A sincere Muslim strives to have integrity in speech at all times, not just for show. Logically, a community of people who police their own tongues because they answer to God will have more genuine kindness and honesty, even behind closed doors. In contrast, a system that relies purely on human law or reputation might fail whenever people think they can get away with something. For instance, slander might not always be caught by law, but a God-conscious person will avoid slander even if they’d never be caught, because they care about the divine record and their own soul. Theology here reinforces ethics: believing that speech is a form of worship (or sin) motivates Muslims to hold themselves to a high standard consistently. This arguably is “the best” approach because it’s anchored in personal faith, not external enforcement alone.

3. Balance Between Honesty and Kindness:
Some alternative views about speech might promote blunt honesty at all costs (“I just speak my mind, no filter”), while others might promote extreme quietism or flattery (never saying what you really think, even if it’s important). Islam strikes a wise balance. We are taught to speak truth – honesty is a must – but to do so in a kind and wise manner. For example, if a friend is doing something wrong, Islam wouldn’t say “remain silent and let them harm themselves.” It would say “find the best, most compassionate way to advise them (speak good).” On the other hand, if being “honest” in a situation just means hurting someone’s feelings unnecessarily or creating conflict, then it’s better to be silent or find better words. This balance is far superior to a chaotic free-for-all where people blurt out any cruel thought in the name of honesty (leading to hurt), and superior to a repressed environment where people say only nice things but hide the truth (leading to hypocrisy or unresolved issues). Islam effectively teaches: be truthful, but there’s always a kind way to be truthful. Even with criticism, the Quran says “argue in a way that is best” – use respectful words. So logically, Islam’s approach results in truth being told, but in a way that is constructive, not destructive. This encourages solutions and understanding, rather than conflict or fake politeness that solves nothing.

4. Social Harmony and Trust:
If everyone actually acted on “speak good or remain silent,” imagine the social transformation. Bullying would virtually disappear because bullies rely on hurtful words. Marriages and friendships would improve because people would avoid the sharp tongues that often cause lasting scars. Workplaces would be more pleasant with no gossip or nasty office politics. Even international diplomacy would improve if leaders committed to respectful, truthful speech (no insults or lies). Now, one might say, “Well, other philosophies also encourage good speech.” That’s true – many cultures value politeness. But Islam uniquely ties it into worship of God, making it a spiritual obligation. This adds a strong incentive. It’s not just “nice to do,” it’s “pleasing to my Lord and part of my faith.” That level of importance can create a more consistent practice. Historically, Islamic civilizations placed great emphasis on adab (proper etiquette), which included refined speech. Travelers often noted that markets in Muslim lands had less open cursing or that even when people disagreed in scholarly debates, they addressed each other with titles like “my respected brother” as they argued. This was a direct result of generations being raised on these teachings. The logical outcome is a society where people feel safer and more respected, which is definitely “best” for human well-being.

5. Emotional and Mental Health Benefits:
Modern psychology confirms a lot of what Islam teaches about speech. We now know that words can deeply affect mental health. Positive words of affirmation can boost someone’s confidence and emotional well-being, while verbal abuse can cause trauma, anxiety, and depression. The Islamic rule pushes us to be a source of positive words (thereby healing and helping others) and not to be a source of verbal harm (thereby avoiding causing psychological pain). Also, by avoiding constant idle talk or negative chatter, a person’s own mind stays more peaceful. Have you noticed how complaining a lot or engaging in gossip can actually make you more irritated or unhappy? Islam says cut that out, which actually preserves a calmer, more content mindset. Instead, fill that space with remembering Allah or saying uplifting things. This leads to inner peace and stronger relationships. In comparison, a lifestyle of unfiltered speech might feel “liberating” to some, but it often leaves behind hurt feelings, regret, and a toxic environment. Islam’s controlled approach fosters a healthier emotional atmosphere for everyone involved.

6. Avoiding Legalistic Complexities with a Moral Principle:
In some societies, harmful speech is addressed by a web of laws: anti-defamation laws, harassment policies, etc. While those are necessary, Islam provides a simple guiding principle that, if truly followed, makes many of those laws almost unnecessary. If I never lie, no one needs to sue me for libel. If I never harass, there’s no need for a disciplinary hearing. If I never verbally abuse, my relationships don’t need mediation. In that sense, Islam’s principle is proactive and holistic, whereas legal measures are reactive and specific. It’s “the best” in that it catches all possible scenarios of harmful speech under one umbrella, by appealing to personal ethics and God-consciousness. It’s like an internal policeman in your heart that is more effective (and present 24/7) than external policemen who can’t be everywhere.

7. Speech as Worship – A Positive Alternative:
Another perspective: while Islam puts restrictions on bad speech, it opens the door wide for good speech. The amount of virtuous things one can do with the tongue is immense: praying, reciting Quran, saying words of kindness, teaching knowledge, counseling someone, speaking truth to power, defending the oppressed, reconciling people, spreading Salaam (peace), and even just everyday polite talk that puts people at ease. Islam frames using the tongue for these purposes as not just okay, but highly rewardable. So rather than seeing “remain silent” as stifling, look at “speak good” as encouraging the best use of our ability to communicate. Many other philosophies might not consider speech as a form of worship or something that earns spiritual merit. Islam does. That motivates believers to actively engage in more positive dialogues, activism through words, and remembrance of God. The result is a rich culture of valuable speech – like beautiful poetry, uplifting sermons, sincere prayers – instead of a culture drowned in trivial chatter or harmful rhetoric. This positive outlook on speech as a force of good is, in a way, an alternative to boredom or negative talk. It’s like saying: “Don’t waste your words on X, use them for Y which is so much better!” That’s a very empowering approach and arguably superior to simply telling people “Don’t talk.” It tells them what to talk about instead – talk about good things.

8. Freedom from Regret:
How often have you lain in bed thinking, “Ugh, I shouldn’t have said that today”? It’s one of the most common human regrets. By following Islam’s guideline, one can significantly reduce those moments. It feels much better at day’s end to have held your tongue during an argument than to have won the argument by hurting someone and then feeling guilty. In alternative “speak your mind” approaches, maybe you get momentary satisfaction by snapping at someone, but later you might lose a friend or feel shame. The Islamic approach may require some self-control in the moment, but it saves you from that regret and damage. In the long run, you maintain dignity and good relations. Who wouldn’t prefer that outcome? Thus, logically, a path that minimizes future regret and self-reproach is the wiser one.

In summary, Islam’s teaching on speech is like a comprehensive package deal: it secures personal goodness, social harmony, spiritual reward, and emotional well-being all at once. Alternative perspectives might champion absolute free speech with no limits, but that often leads to abuse of that freedom and harm to others. Islam says free speech is fine, as long as it’s not hurting truth or people. Some other perspective might say “Never say a negative word,” but Islam is more nuanced: sometimes a tough word is needed for justice or correcting wrong, yet even then it must be said in the best way. This flexibility within principle makes Islam’s stance very practical and wise.

Moreover, Islam frames the whole discussion in terms of accountability to God and goodness to mankind, which gives it a strong moral grounding. It’s not just societal convention or etiquette (which people might ignore when angry); it’s a matter of faith and ethics (which touches the conscience even when one is angry).

Ultimately, when we compare outcomes: a community living by “speak good or stay silent” vs. a community with a different attitude, it’s clear the former would be more peaceful, united, and compassionate. Thus, both logically (for worldly peace) and theologically (for spiritual success and God’s pleasure), Islam’s teaching on controlling the tongue stands out as the best path.

Miracles Related to Speech and Silence

Islamic history and scripture contain some fascinating instances where miracles involved speaking or staying silent. While the principle of “speaking only good or remaining silent” is a moral teaching, there are a few miraculous stories and aspects in Islam that highlight the power and significance of speech (or the wisdom of silence) in extraordinary ways. Here are a few noteworthy examples:

1. The Miraculous Speech of Baby Jesus (Isa):
One of the most famous miracles related to speech in the Quran is the story of Prophet Isa (Jesus) speaking as a newborn baby. In Surah Maryam (Chapter 19 of the Quran), we learn that Mary (Maryam), the mother of Jesus, was commanded by Allah to observe a vow of silence when she returned to her people after giving birth. This itself is interesting: she was effectively told to “remain silent” and not respond to any accusations. When her people confronted her, shocked that she had a baby without being married, she simply pointed to the infant Jesus. At that moment, by Allah’s power, baby Jesus spoke in defense of his mother’s honor. He said: “Indeed, I am a servant of Allah. He has given me the Scripture and made me a prophet. He has made me blessed wherever I am... and He has not made me a miserable tyrant. So peace be upon me the day I was born, the day I die, and the day I will be raised back to life.” (summarized from Quran 19:30-33). This miraculous speech silenced the detractors and was a sign of Isa’s prophethood. How does this relate to our topic? It shows that sometimes remaining silent and letting truth speak for itself (in this case literally through a miracle) is more powerful than trying to answer critics with our own words. Mary could have tried to explain herself (and who would have believed her?), but Allah’s instruction for her to stay silent and the subsequent miracle taught a lesson: truth will manifest in the most beautiful way if we are patient and trust in God. Also, Jesus’s first miracle was using speech for a good purpose (defending the innocent and declaring God’s message). This underscores that noble speech can itself be a miracle.

2. The Prophet Zachariah’s Sign of Silence:
Prophet Zakariya (Zachariah), the father of John the Baptist (Prophet Yahya), experienced a miraculous silence. The Quran tells us that Zakariya prayed fervently for a child in old age. When Allah answered his prayer and gave him the good news that he would have a righteous son (Yahya), Zakariya asked for a sign as confirmation. Allah replied that Zakariya’s sign would be that he would lose the ability to speak to people for three days despite being otherwise healthy (Quran 19:10). Indeed, for those days, Zakariya could only communicate with gestures. He used that time to remember and glorify Allah even more. This temporary, miraculous silence was a sign of God’s power and the special nature of the coming child. It’s interesting that a silence was used as a divine sign. It perhaps taught Zakariya (and teaches us) the value of reflection and remembrance without speech. Sometimes, being forced into silence can be a gift – it allows deep contemplation and prevents us from saying anything that might not be appropriate in excitement or impatience. When his tongue was freed, Zakariya emerged with even more gratitude. So, in his story, silence itself was a miracle and a blessing. It reminds us that quiet moments can be spiritually significant and full of remembrance, which is the best use of the tongue when one does speak again (as Zakariya did by coming out and praising God among his people as soon as he could talk).

3. The Miracle of the Quran – The Ultimate Good Word:
Muslims consider the Quran itself to be a living miracle — a miracle of speech and language. Although not a “miracle story” like the above, it is highly relevant to our theme. The Quran is often called “Kalamullah,” meaning the Speech of Allah or the Word of God. Its words have inspired billions over 14 centuries. One aspect of its miraculous nature is its unmatched eloquence and goodness. The Quran challenges skeptics to produce even one chapter like it, but none have succeeded; this is known as the linguistic miracle of the Quran. The content of the Quran is all truth and guidance — essentially, it is the ultimate example of speaking only good. There is not a single word in it that is false or evil. Muslims recite Quran aloud in prayers and memorize it, which means our tongues are busy with the best possible speech. The existence of the Quran demonstrates how one book of pure “good speech” can transform individuals and societies. It took often harsh and ignorant people (in pre-Islamic Arabia) and, through its words, softened their hearts, filled them with wisdom, and made them leaders of a moral community. This shows the miraculous power of good words. While human speech often fails or has flaws, the Quran as divine speech shows what perfect truthful speech can achieve. In a way, when we strive to “speak only good,” we are trying to emulate a fraction of the Quran’s ethos in our daily communication — speaking truth, guidance, and mercy as much as we can.

4. The Prophet Muhammad’s Concise Speech (Jawami’ al-Kalim):
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said, “I have been given Jawami’ al-Kalim,” which means “concise speech that carries great meaning.” This is considered one of the miracles or special gifts given to him. It’s amazing how the Prophet could say a short sentence that people can easily memorize, yet it holds layers of depth (many of the hadith we quoted are examples of this). “Speak good or remain silent” is just three words in Arabic (“qul khayran aw ismut”), but we wrote pages about its meaning! The Prophet’s ability to pack wisdom into brief phrases is miraculous and it helped his teachings spread among people who mostly were not literate (they memorized his words). This gift also shows in how the Prophet could answer tricky questions in a way that satisfied the questioner and defused tension. For instance, once a man came asking for a very short advice that he could always remember, and the Prophet simply said, “Do not get angry.” The man asked again (perhaps hoping for more), but the Prophet just repeated, “Do not get angry.” (It means, control your anger). That’s it – two words in Arabic (“laa taghdab”). But for someone who truly implements “don’t get angry,” it’s life-changing and prevents countless sins of the tongue that happen in anger. The miraculous aspect here is how economy of words can have tremendous impact. For us, it’s a model: you don’t need to talk a lot to make a point; sometimes one well-placed sentence can be more effective than an hour of lecturing. The Prophet’s concise, wise speech was like miraculously potent words. It also ties back to remaining silent – he spoke when needed and beneficial, not excess. His concise speech implies that he wasn’t babbling on and on; he chose words carefully. That in itself was an embodiment of the principle we’re discussing, and it had almost miraculous clarity and effect on listeners.

5. Miraculous Protection from Bad Speech:
There are a few miraculous incidents where people were protected from others’ bad speech by divine intervention. For example, there’s a story in hadith where a man insulted Abu Bakr (the companion of the Prophet) harshly while the Prophet Muhammad was sitting with him. Abu Bakr remained silent and calm for a while (following the teaching of patience and silence in face of ignorance). The Prophet ﷺ was impressed and stayed seated. But when the man continued, Abu Bakr eventually responded to defend himself. At that point, the Prophet got up and left. Abu Bakr later asked why the Prophet left when he started responding. The Prophet said that as long as Abu Bakr was silent, angels were responding on his behalf (meaning Abu Bakr had divine support and reward for patience), but when Abu Bakr began to answer back, the angels left and a devil came, so the Prophet did not want to sit in that presence. This is not a “miracle” in the grand sense, but it is an unseen occurrence that the Prophet informed us of: when you bear insults with grace and silence, you are not really alone – angels are on your side, and Allah hears and will defend your honor in His own way. It’s as if heaven “speaks” for you when you choose not to retaliate with bad words. Many Muslims can recount times where they bit their tongue during an argument and later saw that the truth came out or the other person apologized, etc., feeling that Allah took care of it. One could see that as a little everyday miracle tied to practicing this principle.

In conclusion, while “speaking good or remaining silent” is mainly a moral and ethical teaching, Islam’s narratives show that speech and silence have played roles in miraculous events by Allah’s will. From babies speaking truth, to prophets being silenced for a time, to the Quran’s powerful words, to the Prophet’s own blessed speech – all these highlight that there is something almost sacred about the tongue and its use. They reinforce our understanding that words are not trivial; they can be a vehicle for the divine or the miraculous. And silence, too, can be a form of obedience that brings about amazing results. These stories inspire Muslims – they remind us that if we use our speech for good, we align ourselves with prophetic behavior and even miracles. And if we sometimes endure in silence for the sake of Allah, He may protect us in ways we can’t imagine. It adds a sense of awe and respect: our tongue isn’t just a random organ; in Islamic perspective, it’s been the site of miracles and revelation, so how much more should we honor it by using it rightly!

Addressing Common Misconceptions

Whenever a principle like “speak only good or remain silent” is discussed, there can be some misunderstandings. Let’s clear up a few common misconceptions about Islam’s teachings on speech, to ensure we have a balanced understanding of the topic:

Misconception 1: “Remaining silent” means never speaking up, even when you see something wrong.
Clarification: This is not true. “Speak good or remain silent” does not mean “always be silent no matter what.” It means you should refrain from bad or useless speech. But if something is wrong or unjust, speaking up against it is not just allowed – it can be an obligation and a very good form of speech. In fact, Islam strongly encourages what’s called “enjoining good and forbidding evil.” Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said, “Whoever among you sees an evil action, let him change it with his hand (action); if he cannot, then with his tongue (by speaking out); and if he cannot, then with his heart – and that is the weakest of faith.” This hadith shows that using your tongue to stop wrong (like advising someone or standing up to a bully or telling the truth about an injustice) is a duty when you’re able. Another hadith states: “The best type of jihad (struggle) is to speak a word of truth in front of a tyrannical ruler.” That means even if it’s dangerous, telling the truth to power is considered one of the greatest things a Muslim can do. So, Islam is not telling us to be mute in the face of oppression or wrongdoing. Remaining silent is encouraged only when speaking would be sinful or not constructive. For example, if someone insults you, then it’s usually better to be silent than to hurl an insult back. But if someone is, say, spreading lies about another person, remaining silent could allow a harmful injustice to continue, so the “good speech” in that case is to clarify the truth kindly. In summary, Islam wants us to use our speech proactively for good causes — helping others, defending rights, giving sincere advice, teaching, reconciling people — and not to misuse speech for evil. Silence is for the times when speaking would either be sinful or make things worse rather than better.

Misconception 2: Islam’s restrictions on speech are against freedom of speech or make Muslims unable to express themselves.
Clarification: Islam does put ethical limits on speech (like don’t lie, don’t slander, don’t curse people), but these are similar to or even milder than the limits every society agrees on to some extent. Think about it: “freedom of speech” in any country usually doesn’t protect things like defamation, false advertising, threats, or shouting fire in a crowded theater. That’s because such speech harms others. Islam’s guidance is rooted in the same logic: speech that causes unjust harm is not allowed. Far from stifling expression, Islam encourages eloquence, poetry, friendly socialization, humor (the Prophet joked, but he only spoke truth when joking), debate, and speaking one’s mind in a respectful manner. Historically, Muslim cultures have rich traditions of spoken word — storytelling, teaching circles, poetry competitions — which shows that positive expression was very alive. The key difference is that Islam asks Muslims to self-regulate their speech for morality. It’s not about a government censor; it’s about each person choosing not to use vile language or lies out of their own piety and goodwill. A Muslim can absolutely express disagreement, voice opinions, and discuss ideas – but ideally in a dignified, factual way. For example, if I disagree with a policy, I shouldn’t lie about it or resort to personal insults; I should argue with evidence and good manners. That’s not a loss of freedom; that’s effective and ethical use of freedom. Another point: the Quran itself encourages us to use wisdom and beautiful preaching when we speak to others about Islam (Quran 16:125). It never says “force people to be quiet.” On the contrary, the Quran often presents dialogues between believers and non-believers, showing that discussion is okay as long as it’s not abusive. So, Muslims are free to speak their minds — just not free to abuse with their minds. In practice, that means a Muslim can be a journalist, a writer, a public speaker, an advocate, etc., and do all of that while still following Islamic etiquette. In fact, their words may carry more weight and credibility because they adhere to honesty and respect.

Misconception 3: Being quiet or gentle in speech is a sign of weakness or lack of confidence.
Clarification: Some people think if you don’t curse or yell, you’re a pushover. Or if you choose silence, you “lost” the exchange. Islam flips this view: it takes more strength to control your tongue than to lash out. Prophet Muhammad said, “The strong person is not the one who can overpower others (in wrestling), but the strong one is the one who controls himself when angry.” It’s easy to shout back when someone shouts at you; it takes real inner strength to stay calm or to respond kindly. Similarly, choosing not to gossip when everyone else at the lunch table is doing it might make you feel left out at first, but it shows integrity and strength of character, not weakness. Over time, those same friends might notice you don’t talk behind others’ backs and realize you likely won’t talk behind their backs either — that actually earns you respect. Another example: In a debate, the person who can keep their cool and present points logically usually “wins” in the eyes of the audience over the person who gets angry and starts name-calling. So gentle speech, far from indicating low confidence, often indicates high self-control and confidence. You’re so confident in your truth that you don’t need to resort to cheap tactics. Also, silence can be very powerful. Sometimes, when someone is trying to provoke you, not giving them the reaction they want is the best way to shut them down. They run out of steam because you didn’t fuel the fire. That’s power. Muslims believe that Allah is on the side of those who are patient and righteous, so even if at the moment it seems like you “lost” by not clapping back, ultimately truth and patience prevail. It’s not weakness; it’s strategy and principle.

Misconception 4: Following these rules means you can’t have fun or joke around.
Clarification: Islam doesn’t forbid joking or casual conversation, as long as it’s within the bounds of truth and kindness. The Prophet ﷺ himself joked with his companions. There’s a narration where an old woman asked if old ladies go to heaven; the Prophet teased her, “No old woman goes to Heaven,” which made her upset for a second, then he clarified with a smile, “because Allah will make you young again before entering Heaven!” So he made a playful remark but it wasn’t a lie — it had a truthful twist and made her happy. His jokes never involved insults, lies, or anything lewd. This sets a template for Muslims: by all means, laugh and make others laugh, but not by putting someone down or lying. Many Muslim cultures have a great sense of humor. You’ll find halal comedy shows, funny anecdotes about Mullah Nasruddin (a character known for clever jokes), etc. So the teaching isn’t meant to make us overly solemn or silent monks. It’s about mindful humor. You can still say silly things, make puns, and have warm chats. Islam is a religion meant for humans, and humans need laughter. In fact, laughter and nice chats can be a form of good speech when they cheer people up or build friendship. They only become an issue if they slip into mockery, vulgarity, or constant time-wasting. Even then, occasional light idle talk isn’t a major sin – it’s just not the best use of time, but it’s human. Islam is merciful and realistic, so it doesn’t expect people to be quoting scriptures 24/7. It just gives an ideal to aim for. One practical approach Muslims take is to avoid cruel humor. Joking about someone in a way that would hurt them (even if they’re not present) is avoided. But joking with someone, where everyone’s laughing together, or general humor, is fine. So yes, you can have a sense of fun and still “speak only good” by making sure your fun doesn’t come at the expense of goodness or someone’s feelings.

Misconception 5: “If I’m supposed to remain silent when I can’t think of something good to say, what about being honest when someone asks for my opinion? Should I lie to be ‘nice’?”
Clarification: Honesty is a core “good” in Islam, so lying is never the solution. Speaking good doesn’t mean you only say compliments and never voice a negative opinion. It means if you do have to say something that might be hard for the listener, you do it with sincerity and tact, not with malice. For instance, if a friend asks for your honest opinion on something personal like, “What do you think of my drawing?” and you think it’s not good – you shouldn’t lie and say “It’s great” if you truly think they want helpful feedback. Lying would be a sin and not actually help them improve. Instead, find a kind way to give critique: maybe highlight something positive first (“I like your choice of colors!”), then gently suggest what can be better (“Maybe you could work a bit on the proportions; that would make it even better.”). This way you spoke the truth (which is good) and you maintained kindness. The Prophet said “ الدين النصيحة” – “Religion is sincere advice,” meaning giving honest, well-wishing advice is part of being a good Muslim. So remaining silent isn’t an excuse to avoid helping someone by telling them a truth they need to hear. The key is intention: is your criticism to help or just to hurt? If it’s to help, phrase it helpfully (that’s “speaking good”). If you find you can’t say it in a good way right now (maybe you’re angry, or you haven’t thought it through), then wait until you can phrase it better or you’ve calmed down. This aligns with the hadith: when angry, be quiet (so you don’t say something harsh you don’t really mean). Then speak later calmly. Also, Islam allows withholding certain truths in specific cases to prevent harm. For example, you don’t have to volunteer negative opinions nobody asked for. And you are allowed to say something diplomatically to avoid conflict – this isn’t lying, it’s wisdom. A known principle from hadith: it’s permitted to say a gentle, non-direct truth to reconcile between people. Suppose two friends fought; each is mad. If one says, “I don’t want to talk to him again,” you could later tell the other, “He feels bad about what happened and really does care about you,” even if the first friend didn’t use those exact words. You’re smoothing the friction with a positive spin, not exactly lying but maybe stating what you believe is in their hearts deep down. This is considered a praiseworthy exception to total bluntness. In general, though, everyday honesty about opinions should always be coupled with kindness. That’s the Islamic way – truth with mercy.

Misconception 6: Only religious speech is considered "good speech" in Islam.
Clarification: While remembering Allah (dhikr), reciting Quran, and speaking about religion are certainly very valued forms of good speech, they are not the only forms. Islam encourages all kinds of beneficial talk. Teaching someone any useful knowledge (like math, science, life skills) is good speech. Saying a kind hello to a neighbor is good. Telling a child a bedtime story to make them feel loved is good. Thanking someone, cheering up your spouse with loving words, making friendly small talk to brighten a cashier’s day — all these count as positive speech. The Prophet ﷺ said even words to reconcile or mediate peace between people are extremely rewarded (because you heal relationships). The Quran says “a kind word and forgiveness is better than charity followed by injury” (2:263), implying a kind word can sometimes be better than giving money in charity if that money is given rudely. So any kind, truthful, useful, or necessary speech = good speech. Islam does put the remembrance of Allah as the best speech (for example saying “SubhanAllah” or “Alhamdulillah” is considered very heavy in reward), but Islam is a complete way of life, not just rituals. So discussing everyday matters in a wholesome way is part of a Muslim’s life and is absolutely fine. The only time something neutral might become not-so-good is if it becomes excessive to the point of neglecting duties. For instance, talking all night about sports and then missing the dawn prayer – that chatter, while not sinful in itself, led to a bad outcome, so that would be considered a problem. Otherwise, sports talk, hobby talk, etc., are neutral and part of living a normal life. Islam’s idea isn’t to turn everyone into monks who only talk about scripture. It’s to integrate consciousness of Allah into normal life, such that our normal life conversations remain decent and our more profound conversations include remembering Allah.

By addressing these misconceptions, we see that Islam’s teaching on speech is balanced, practical, and meant to enhance life, not to restrict it unnecessarily. Muslims are expected to be kind but also courageous, polite but also honest. The teachings basically shield against the destructive uses of speech while encouraging all the positive uses. It’s like training in any skill – once you avoid the bad techniques, you’re free to excel in the good ones. A Muslim who understands this will try to make their words sweet and their silence meaningful, without feeling oppressed or muted. They know when to speak up and when to hold back, and that’s actually a very empowering skill set to have.

Practical Application: Tips for Daily Life

Knowing the importance of speaking good or being silent is one thing — but how do we put it into practice in our busy, daily lives? Here are some practical tips and guidance for Muslims (and really, anyone!) to implement this principle. These suggestions are straightforward and suitable for everyday situations, whether at home, school, work, or online. Try incorporating these habits step by step:

1. Think Before You Speak: It sounds simple, but it’s powerful. Before you say something, pause for a second and ask yourself: “Is this true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?” You don’t need a full minute, just a brief check. If the answer is no, perhaps reformulate your words or decide it’s better not said. For example, you’re about to make a sarcastic joke — is it kind or could it hurt someone’s feelings? This little mental filter can save you from a lot of “oops, I shouldn’t have said that” moments. It might feel awkward at first, but soon it becomes quick and natural.

2. Remember the Consequences: Keep in mind those teachings that angels are writing and that a small word can have big impact. When you’re in a heated situation, remind yourself: “I’m accountable for what I say now. I can earn blessings or sin with my tongue in the next minute.” This consciousness (called taqwa in Islam) acts like a brake on the tongue. For instance, if you feel like yelling at a sibling for annoying you, recalling that Allah is listening might make you choose calmer words or walk away to cool down. It’s not to scare you, but to make you aware that your words matter to God and to people.

3. Practice Silence (Take a “Speech Fast”): Just as fasting from food trains self-control, occasionally fast from speaking unnecessarily. You can start small: perhaps decide that for one hour each day, you will only speak if you have something beneficial to say. Or you could allocate 10 minutes in the morning to just be quiet and remember Allah. This trains you to not feel like you must fill every silence. It also makes you comfortable with not blurting out everything that comes to mind. Many people find that after practicing a bit of quiet, they become more thoughtful in their speech all the time. It’s like an exercise for your “patience muscle.” Also, when you do speak after a period of quiet, you might find your words are more deliberate and clear.

4. Use Your Words for Good Daily: Make it a habit each day to say something good to someone. It could be a compliment (“You did a great job on that project”), an expression of gratitude (“Thanks for cooking dinner, Mom”), or words of encouragement (“I believe you can do it!”). This not only earns you reward (remember “a good word is charity”), but it also starts filling your environment with positivity. When you focus on injecting good words regularly, it leaves less room for idle or harmful words. Challenge yourself: perhaps set a goal like “I will give at least three sincere compliments or words of thanks each day.” You’ll notice it lifts the mood of others and yourself. Good speech has a boomerang effect — it often comes back around to you in the form of others being kind and respectful in return.

5. Avoid Triggers for Bad Speech: Identify situations where you’re likely to slip up. Do you tend to gossip when with certain friends? Do you curse when you play video games or sports? Are you tempted to make mean jokes when texting? Once you know your triggers, you can plan to handle them. For instance, if gossip starts when you’re with friends, either steer the conversation to something harmless or gracefully excuse yourself if it gets too much (“I’m going to go grab a drink, be right back” – sometimes just stepping away breaks it up). If certain games get you angry, maybe play for shorter periods or with people who don’t trash-talk, and consciously decide not to type that insult in chat (you can even mute yourself for competitive matches, literally using a tool to remain silent!). If social media makes you want to argue in comment sections, decide a rule like “I won’t reply immediately; I’ll wait an hour and see if I still care to respond calmly.” By knowing when your tongue is in danger, you can guard it better. The Quran says “Satan is an open enemy” and wants to cause discord; being mindful of scenarios where you often regret what you said helps you beat that enemy’s trap.

6. Substitute Bad Words with Good Expressions: If you have a habit of cussing or using slang that’s crude, try swapping those words out. For example, many Muslims say “Astaghfirullah” (which means “I seek forgiveness from Allah”) when they’re shocked or upset, instead of a curse word. Or say “SubhanAllah” (“Glory be to God”) when something surprises you. It not only prevents foul language, but turns that moment into a mini-act of worship! You can also use neutral funny words to vent (some people say “ouch” or “dang” or even made-up words that sound goofy but aren’t offensive). It might seem silly, but over time, these replacements can totally push out the habit of swearing or harsh exclamations. Similarly, instead of calling someone a name in anger, practice using descriptions of the action not the person. For instance, if a friend is late instead of “You’re so inconsiderate!” say “This delay is inconsiderate.” Criticize the act, not the person; it’s more constructive and less hurtful.

7. Apologize and Correct Mistakes: We’re human — even trying our best, we will slip up. When you do say something hurtful or wrong, address it quickly. Apologizing is part of good speech too! Tell the person, “I’m sorry for what I said earlier, I didn’t mean it that way,” or “I realize I shouldn’t have said that, please forgive me.” It takes humility, but it prevents one bad word from turning into a lasting scar. Also, seek forgiveness from Allah for any backbiting or lies you uttered, and try to make amends (for example, if you gossiped, go counteract it by saying good things about that person or correcting the misinformation you spread). By cleaning up our verbal messes promptly, we reinforce to ourselves why we want to avoid making them in the first place. Plus, people will respect you for owning up to mistakes, and it keeps relationships healthy.

8. Engage in Remembrance (Dhikr): One effective way to curb idle or harmful talk is to keep your tongue busy with remembering Allah. You can do this quietly under your breath anytime — saying phrases like Alhamdulillah (All praise is for Allah), SubhanAllah, Allahu Akbar (God is the Greatest), etc., or reciting a short Quran verse you know, or sending peace and blessings on the Prophet (Salallahu alayhi wasallam). If you make this a regular habit, you’ll find not only spiritual peace, but also that you’re less tempted to fill every moment with chatter. For example, instead of humming a gossip or singing a rude lyric, you’re whispering prayers. It’s hard for foul language to slip out of a mouth that’s often engaged in holy words. It sort of “purifies” your vocabulary and mindset. The Prophet said “Whoever believes in Allah should say good or keep silent,” and he also said “Keep your tongue moist with the remembrance of Allah.” These go hand in hand. Whenever you catch yourself with nothing in particular to say — use that gap to remember Allah. It’s a productive substitution.

9. Choose Good Company: Our environment heavily influences our speech. Try to surround yourself with people who speak well. When your friends are respectful and positive, you’ll naturally mirror that. Conversely, if everyone around you curses, gossips, or tells dirty jokes, it’s much harder to resist joining in. While we can’t always choose classmates or coworkers, we can choose who we spend extra time with or whom we emulate. If you have a friend who is particularly careful with their words (you notice they never backbite or they’re always uplifting), spend more time with them and watch how they interact. It will inspire you. And gently, you can encourage your circle toward better speech by setting an example. Sometimes, you may need to reduce time with a group that constantly drags you into bad conversations. It might be tough socially, but remember, true friends will respect your values. Often, if you politely say, “Hey guys, can we not talk about this person? It doesn’t feel right,” you might be surprised — some others might agree and be relieved you spoke up, or at least they’ll remember your stance and perhaps tease you a bit but also hold back when you’re around (which is still a win). Be the influence if you can’t find one.

10. Use Technology Wisely: In our era, “speaking” isn’t only with our mouths — it’s also texting, posting, commenting, etc. Apply the same rules online or on the phone as you would in person. It’s easy to type something you’d never say face-to-face, because the screen gives a false sense of distance. Remind yourself: my texts and posts are also recorded by Allah. Before sending that angry reply or sharing that rumor on WhatsApp, pause and think. Many people have group chats that sometimes slip into backbiting or crude memes; you can politely steer conversation to something else or simply not engage with the negative content (don’t leave a laugh react on a mean meme, for instance, if you feel it’s inappropriate). Social media debates are another area: ask yourself if that Twitter argument is worth your time — often it’s not, and silence (or muting the thread) is better for your peace. On the positive side, use tech to speak good: send messages of dua (prayers) to family, comment something supportive on a friend’s post, share beneficial knowledge or inspirational quotes. The same tongue rule “benefit or be quiet” can translate to “post something beneficial or don’t post.” Practicing digital etiquette is now part of guarding our “tongue.”

11. Develop Empathy: Try to put yourself in others’ shoes before speaking. This is the golden rule: speak to others how you’d like to be spoken to. If you wouldn’t like someone making that joke about you, don’t make it about them. If you’d appreciate a gentle tone, use a gentle tone with others. Empathy can greatly improve our speech, because we start choosing words that we know we’d find respectful or kind if said to us. For example, when giving feedback, think, “If I were them, how would I want this pointed out?” When disagreeing, “How would I want someone to show me I might be wrong?” This leads to phrasing things more politely. Also, if you do hurt someone, empathize by thinking how you’d feel; that will push you to apologize sincerely and to be more careful next time. Allah in the Quran often tells us to speak kindly to people and mentions “for Allah loves the doers of good” – part of doing good (ihsan) is treating people as you’d hope to be treated, or even better.

12. Seek Knowledge and Improve: Sometimes we say incorrect things simply out of ignorance. Continuously learn about what Islam considers permissible or impermissible in speech. For instance, many don’t know how serious backbiting is – once they learn the Quran’s and hadith’s warnings about it (comparing it to eating a dead brother’s flesh, etc.), they become much more wary. Learning definitions (backbiting is saying anything about someone they wouldn’t like, even if true; slander is lying about them; both are sins) helps one catch themselves. Or learning when it’s allowed to speak about someone (like reporting abuse to an authority is allowed, or asking for advice about a situation is allowed even if it involves mentioning someone’s wrong – because that’s a genuine need, not gossip). By learning, you can apply the rules properly without going to extremes. Also, read the Prophet’s sayings and the scholars’ advice (like we quoted from Imam Shafi’i, etc.). This not only motivates you but gives you practical wisdom. Many Islamic books on manners (Adab) list common pitfalls of the tongue and how to avoid them. The more you know, the more conscious you become. It’s like training in any craft – you study and then you implement and keep refining. The Prophet’s life is full of examples of how he responded with excellent words in various scenarios; studying those stories can provide a model for us in similar moments.

13. Make Dua (Supplication): Never underestimate the power of asking Allah for help. The tongue is notoriously hard to control — even the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) used to make a dua, “O Allah, help me remember You, to thank You, and to worship You properly.” We can also pray, “O Allah, guide my tongue and make my words righteous.” There’s a beautiful short prayer: “O Allah, set right for me my tongue.” When we consistently ask for Allah’s assistance, He will facilitate it for us. If you have a particular issue, like swearing or gossiping, make dua specifically about it: “Ya Allah, remove from me the habit of __ and replace it with speech that pleases You.” Over time, you’ll find yourself more aware and it will become easier — that’s the blessing of dua and Allah’s guidance acting on you. Also, starting the day with intentions like “I aim to guard my tongue today” and asking Allah to help you do so can put you in the right mindset from the morning.

By implementing these practical steps, bit by bit, you’ll likely notice a big improvement in your communication. It’s not an overnight transformation – it’s a journey. You might focus on one tip per week. For example, Week 1, practice “think before speak.” Week 2, focus on cutting gossip. Week 3, add a daily dhikr routine. And so on. Gradually, speaking good or staying silent becomes second nature. Remember, we’re all a work in progress. Don’t be discouraged by occasional setbacks; every day is a new opportunity.

Also, encourage family members or friends to join you in these efforts. You can keep each other in check kindly (“Oops, that was a bit mean, let’s rephrase that”). Set family rules like no phones at dinner so everyone can have quality talk with kindness, or a policy that if anyone says something hurtful, they apologize and maybe say two nice things to outweigh it. Be creative in making an environment that supports virtuous speech.

In the end, the goal is not just to avoid harm, but to make our tongues instruments of positivity – remembering Allah, spreading truth, and bringing joy or comfort to others. By practicing daily, a Muslim can truly live up to the ideal of being someone whose words are a source of light and not darkness. And when we slip, we seek forgiveness and try again. With sincere effort and Allah’s help, our tongues can become our allies on the path to Paradise, rather than something that trips us.

Conclusion

In Islam, the way we use our tongue is a reflection of our heart and our faith. As we’ve explored, speaking only good or remaining silent isn’t just a nice slogan – it’s a profound principle that touches every part of life. Let’s summarize the key takeaways and why this teaching is so beneficial for both individuals and society:

As we conclude, it’s worth making a personal commitment. We’ve learned a lot about “speaking only good or remaining silent” – now let’s aim to live it. It might help to start each morning with the du’a (prayer): “O Allah, I ask You for guidance in my speech today. Help me say what is good and protect me from uttering what is bad.” Then make a conscious intention: “Today, I will try my best to speak with truth, kindness, and purpose. And if I slip, I’ll seek forgiveness and try again.” Over time, with practice, we won’t have to force it so much – it will become part of our character, inshaAllah (God willing).

Imagine meeting Allah on the Last Day and seeing a record of your life’s words – how beautiful if, thanks to effort and Allah’s mercy, that record is full of kind statements, helpful advice, words of worship, and very little to be ashamed of. That is a success. And imagine the world we’d live in if most people followed this rule – it would truly be closer to peace on earth.

Let’s be part of making that change, starting with ourselves. Good words are like good trees – let’s plant them and let them grow. And if we have nothing good to say, the silence we keep is like water that keeps harmful weeds from sprouting. In both cases, we’re contributing to a more beautiful moral ecosystem.

May Allah grant us the wisdom and strength to implement this Prophetic teaching. May He purify our tongues and hearts. And may our words be a source of healing, comfort, and guidance for us and those around us. Ameen.

Recommended Books & Resources on Islamic Etiquette of Speech

For those who want to learn more or deepen their understanding, here is a list of some mainstream, well-regarded books (and one or two other resources) that deal with the topic of speech and ethics in Islam. These books cover themes like controlling the tongue, good manners in speech, Islamic character, and related topics. They are beneficial for further study or personal development. Many of them are available in English translations.

Title & Author Description
Riyadh as-Salihin by Imam Yahya an-Nawawi Riyadh as-Salihin (meaning “Gardens of the Righteous”) is a famous collection of hadiths focusing on ethics, manners, and spirituality. It has whole chapters dedicated to the virtues of controlling one’s tongue, avoiding backbiting, truthfulness, and gentleness in speech. It’s a highly recommended classic for learning day-to-day Sunnah manners.
Al-Adab Al-Mufrad by Imam Muhammad al-Bukhari Compiled by the same Imam Bukhari who collected Sahih Bukhari, this book focuses specifically on Islamic manners (Adab). It includes many narrations from the Prophet ﷺ and the early generations about speech etiquette, respecting others in words, and silencing oneself from evil talk. It’s a great resource for seeing practical examples of how the Prophet and companions spoke.
The Manners of Speech (Chapter in Ihya Ulum al-Din) by Imam Abu Hamid al-Ghazali Imam Ghazali’s Ihya is a monumental work on Islamic spirituality and ethics. One part is about the “tongue” or speech. It details the blessings of the tongue and its potential dangers, listing things like lying, backbiting, slander, etc., and how to cure those habits. It’s very insightful for someone wanting an in-depth look at inner morals related to speech. (In English, look for abridged translations or sections of Ihya that focus on this.)
Don’t Be Sad by Aaidh al-Qarni This is a modern self-help style Islamic book (originally in Arabic: La Tahzan) that, while primarily about coping with life’s challenges, contains sections on avoiding negative speech (like complaining too much or engaging in arguments) and using positive words to improve one’s outlook. It’s written in a simple, uplifting style and is very popular. It’s not solely about speech, but reinforces related concepts.
Islamic Manners by Shaykh Abdul Fattah Abu Ghuddah A concise book focusing on etiquette in Islam for everyday life. It addresses how a Muslim should conduct themselves in gatherings, how to converse politely, not interrupting others, speaking gently, etiquette of joking, and more. It’s grounded in hadith and the practice of pious Muslims. Great for practical do’s and don’ts in social speech settings.
The Ideal Muslim by Dr. Muhammad Ali al-Hashimi This book (and its counterpart The Ideal Muslimah for women) outlines the characteristics of a good Muslim man in all roles (as a friend, neighbor, spouse, etc.). Throughout these roles, it emphasizes guarding the tongue – for example, the Ideal Muslim does not backbite, speaks kindly to his family, avoids dirty language, etc. It’s filled with Quran and hadith references, making it a beneficial guide to model one’s character, including speech.
Guarding the Tongue by Muhammad bin Ibrahim al-Hamd (Published by IIPH) A short treatise specifically on the topic of the tongue. It covers Quranic verses, hadiths, and sayings of scholars about the importance of controlling speech. It also gives practical advice on how to develop the habit of mindful speech. It’s a good quick read for someone who wants a focused reminder on this issue.
Lectures by Contemporary Scholars (Audio/Video) Not a book, but worth mentioning: talks by scholars and speakers like Mufti Ismail Menk, Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan, Sheikh Yasir Qadhi, and Omar Suleiman often include segments on good speech. For instance, Nouman Ali Khan’s lecture on “Think Before You Speak” or Mufti Menk’s reminders about social media etiquette. These are easily found online (e.g., YouTube) and can be very relatable for a modern audience, reinforcing what the classical books teach with current examples.
Mukhtasar Minhaj Al-Qasidin – (section on “Evils of the Tongue”) by Ibn Qudamah al-Maqdisi This is an abridgment of Ibn Jawzi’s refinement of Ghazali’s Ihya — in simpler terms, a summarized classic on ethics. The section on the “tongue” is very insightful. Ibn Qudamah, a respected Hanbali scholar, lists 20 specific vices of the tongue and discusses each. It reads almost like a manual: from lying and backbiting to more subtle ones like excessive compliments or arguing. It’s useful to identify where one might need work. (The book is available in English as “Dispraising the Self” or within “Purification of the Soul” compilations.)
40 Hadiths on the Prophet’s Character (various compilations) There are small booklets or sections of books that specifically gather hadith about the Prophet’s gentleness, forgiving nature, and way of speaking. For example, it’s noted in hadith that “he did not speak unnecessarily, and he would turn fully to the person he addressed”, etc. Reading about how the Prophet ﷺ communicated can serve as a practical role model. Some books like Shamaa’il at-Tirmidhi (The Prophet’s Shamail by Imām Tirmidhi) also describe the Prophet’s manner of speaking and listening.
Etiquettes of Social Life by Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi (or similar by scholars from the Indian subcontinent) Scholars from South Asia have written many adab books in Urdu (some translated to English) that cover Islamic manners including speech. Maulana Thanvi, for instance, touched on how a Muslim should speak with parents, elders, scholars, etc., in a respectful way. These works, though cultural in some examples, are rooted in Quran and hadith and can be insightful especially on respectful speech hierarchy (like how to speak to someone older vs younger, etc., which is part of Islamic etiquette).